Maturation and the Expansion of the Self

The 2nd Basic Dynamic of Spiritual Growth

This is the third article in my series “Spiritual Adulting: Becoming Responsible and Going Deep”, which will continue throughout the month.

Back in 2004, I joined a forum community called "Xian Goth Dot Net". It prominently displayed its tagline upon landing, which read, "Legalism Destroys".

It was there that I had my first encounter with a transgender person. This community, it turned out, was a refuge for those who were different. So, Gothic Christians who identified as gay, lesbian, or transgender found a home there.

To be honest, I went into this forum accepting gays and lesbians, but not so much the transgendered. Because I couldn’t wrap my brain around it, I assumed their struggles resulted from mental issues.

Listening to the conversations these castaways had among themselves on the message boards caused me to grow in my appreciation for their humanity. I could empathize with the general struggles. I could understand why they felt hurt and angry.

Listening to their stories changed me…and my theological position became one of full support. 

Inevitably, fundamentalist trolls would roll into the community and start quoting their Bible verses to authoritatively declare that everyone in this community was going to hell if they didn't repent. I and another member became the theological defenders of the community. If they wanted to play with Bible verses, we were very well-equipped to do just that.

Over time, I became a part of the community. I identified with this group, and they became a part of my tribe.

For me, this period in my life was a time of rapid maturation.