How to Resist Evil Without Doing Evil

Recognizing, Realizing, and Resisting Evil, Part 5

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Do not repay anyone evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all. If it is possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. 

Romans 12:17–18

Yeah, easier said than done.

I don’t know about you, but when someone hurts me or makes me feel threatened, I can feel pretty reactionary. Regardless of whether it's actually a threat to my survival or just a threat to my ego, I feel a strong desire to lash out and protect myself in some way.

And when I'm under a lot of stress, it's a lot easier to give in to that desire to react. Next thing you know, biting my tongue is the hardest thing in the world, and it's not a guaranteed success. 

So, I try to let it go. I try to forgive and move on with my life when people cause me to feel offended or threatened. 

But, what about when the threat is extreme? What about when it is so extreme that we feel like we have to label it as nothing less than “evil”?

I think it’s all our duty to strive to stop evil from spreading in this world. But doing that can be tricky. We don't want to become unwitting perpetrators of the very evil we’re trying to stop.

So, how do we resist evil without resorting to evil?

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Begin by seeing the trap

I suspect you‘ve probably gotten yourself into more than a few arguments in your life. I also suspect many of those arguments included yelling.

Have you ever gotten someone to sincerely agree with your position by yelling at them? Ever? Have you ever decided the other person was right because they were yelling at you?

Amazing how that doesn’t work, huh? Not only does yelling not help, it’s actually counter-productive.

Yelling, name-calling, belittling, snarkiness, sarcasm, and a whole host of other aggressive behaviors naturally cause the recipients of that behavior to become defensive. When they do, the possibility of helping them see an issue from a different perspective (let alone changing their mind) becomes impossible. 

If you are trying to force someone to agree with you, your opponent isn't just that person. Your real opponent is the evolutionary process itself.

Human beings are wired to survive. If you make them feel threatened for any reason whatsoever, you trigger a survival mechanism. As a direct result of your behavior, they will dig in their heels and entrench even deeper into their position.

In other words, if your goal is to change someone's mind or behavior, any form of aggression is counterproductive. Paul advises us, “Do not repay evil with evil”. Even though this is hard, it’s important to recognize that this is extremely practical advice.

Overall, we do not want to perpetuate the cycle of evil, but rather diminish it. So, we want to do everything we can to avoid engaging evil with evil.

But, if we choose to abandon that path, what options do we have available to us? 

The humanizing way of Christ

How we view people frames how we relate to them. When we view others as a threat, we become defensive and put emotional distance between ourselves and them. We start to see them as “other” and treat them accordingly. 

This process of othering is a dehumanizing process. We stop relating to them as human beings (like us) and treat them as though they are something entirely different. In cases of “radical othering”, we may even start to label those people as “vermin” or “viruses”, things that need to be eradicated. 

This dehumanizing dynamic of othering is foundational to being able to engage in evil in the first place. Indeed, as long as we maintain our ability to humanize others and relate to them, we prevent those seeds of evil within us from growing. 

As Jesus hung on the cross, he looked upon those who were killing him and said, “Father forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing”. He is identifying with their humanity. Our enemies—those who wish us harm—are the most extreme symbol of otherness. And here Jesus refuses to treat them as if they were “other” and instead treats them as if they were himself.

The way of Christ is the way of identifying with the other, including our enemies. And the enemies of Christ are those who bring evil into this world. 

Just because others are engaged in acts of evil, it does not give us the license to dehumanize them. 

And, since we know that repaying evil for evil is ultimately counterproductive (inasmuch as we care about the cause of resisting evil anyway), then we know that releasing the humanizing dynamic into this world is just not some idealistic fantasy. It’s an extremely practical approach to an extremely difficult problem. 

But this brings us to the question, how do we resist evil in a humanizing way? 

Let’s look at some practical things you can do.

Maintain the relationships 

The worst thing you can do in a quest to resist evil is to distance yourself from the people engaged in it. Your ultimate goal is “repentance”, which is a changing of the mind. That happens within the context of grace-filled conversations. And those conversations happen within the context of a healthy relationship. 

Think of it like dealing with someone who has gotten caught up in a cult. The worst possible thing for them would be to lose all ties to the outside. Then, they have no information coming in to them with which to challenge what their cult leaders say.

When you maintain a relationship with them, you function as a potential back door to the system. You can inject new information into their experience. And, they have an escape route if they get to the point where they want out.

I realize maintaining relationships with people engaged in some form of evil is incredibly difficult. After all, our natural instinct is to run away from them and get them out of our lives so we don't have to deal with it. But stick with them for their sake.

Maintaining those relationships is critical.

(Note: This assumes we’re not dealing with a situation in which you need to engage in self-care and maintain your distance.)